Growth

I'm finally out of bed today. It feels good to be out of my bedroom on a bright, beautiful, sunshiny day. I feel tired, which is normal after a chemo round and four days in bed. I have a sore developing from my anti-nausea pressure point bracelets, so I'm glad I feel well enough to take them off. I've lost 13 pounds since my visit to the doctor at the beginning of this round. This is surprising. I didn't eat much for two days after the treatments, but otherwise I have been eating well. The food from The Wellness Kitchen was delicious! I'm so happy to have this resource.

Cathy and I were talking the other day about how neither of us is the same person we were in our 20's, and for me the same goes for my 30's and 40's. In my 20's, first as a college student and then as a graduate, I thought I was all grown up and knew a lot. When I turned 30 I felt like I was starting to get old - ha! I did many foolish things during those years. When I turned 40, I started to actually become an adult. I remember thinking I felt more powerful, and that if I was somewhere I didn't want to be I would leave and if someone asked me to do something and I didn't want to do I would simply say no thank you instead of making up an excuse. Turning 50, especially after dealing with cancer once and being in the midst of battle number two, made me feel old. Wiser, less prone to doing stupid things, but old. This is on my mind because of yesterday. Over the years, I have been to many Super Bowl parties where I read my book during the game because I thought football was boring. Yesterday I watched the entire game. Casey watched bits and pieces of it, but I watched it all. For the first time I found the game more interesting than the commercials! This comes from watching pieces of games with Casey, the Chargers with Sydney when she's here, and memories of watching with my dad. Life is all about growth and change, and it's gratifying to look back on my life and see growth. By the way, the best commercial, in my opinion, was the VW beetle. I am biased since I am on my third VW Westie, but Casey and I both cracked up at that racing little beetle. I also thought the half-time show was awesome. I loved how big and colorful it was - the dancers forming hearts etc, and I love The Black Eyed Peas, Fergie, Slash and Usher. I'll bet it looked amazing from the stands!

So, today I will stay out of bed hopefully all day. I'll get a few things done around the house and I'll take a walk in the sunshine. My first day up I always feel weak and I just manage what I can. Today is the first day of my break from chemo!!

Me and Sydney before the wedding. Get well, my BFF football watching buddy!

l

Namaste, Jill