Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Stupid Cancer.

This is what Bella has:

Hemangiosarcoma (dermal or subcutaneous forms) - Hemangiosarcoma tumors that arise in the skin are different than other types of hemangiosarcoma. The skin form of
hemangiosarcoma is the most easily removed surgically, and thus have the greatest potential for complete cure.

It's skin cancer. Usually dogs who get this are short haired or white. She had it on her back leg, where her fur is thick and black. I can't believe this. Now we watch and wait and hope it doesn't come back. The only treatment option is radiation, and we'd have to go to Santa Cruz. She'd have to be put under for every treatment to keep her still. The good news is this type of cancer rarely goes internal. We saw a different vet in the same office (our vet works part time) and he is a colon cancer survivor. There we were, the three of us, all with a cancer experience. The vet and his twin brother both had colon cancer, and they had tumors in the exact same locations. Weird.

I was watching Brian Williams last night and caught the tail end of a story about the Pill and Ovarian Cancer. They now think the Pill protects women from Ovarian Cancer, and if it's taken for 15 years or more it reduces your risk by 50%. I have pretty much all of the risk factors for this disease: started menstruating young, infertility, infertility drugs, never took the Pill. I posted a question on the Ovarian Cancer Alliance and this is true for many of us. How stupid and unfair is that - denied babies and given cancer instead. Hey universe, that is really f'ed up.

And now my beautiful dog has cancer, too? I'm feeling a little angry this morning.

I also posted a question about clothing. Since my first two surgeries, jeans have not been comfortable. In fact, most pants are not at all comfortable. I live in yoga pants and dresses. I love the online communities I belong to. It helps to know other women are having the same problem. I got tons of responses, and they all said "I thought it was just me!" I had a thing about elastic on my waist all my life - can't abide it. Now I can't stand a waist band, either. I have two pair of stretchy dress pants that I can wear, and that's it. Black pants are not a great idea in A-town in the summer, fall, and parts of spring. Too hot! This has become more of an issue since surgery #3, so I'm going to need a dress buying trip to Macy's before I go back to work in August. Many of the online women have resorted to maternity pants...I am so not going there.

For you teachers who have been on vacation and missed my recent news: My CA125 went up instead of down. It went from 31 to 56. This may be due to the cyst, and if so it will be back down next time. It has always been an accurate indicator for me, though. When it went from 11 to 22 in March of last year, it was back. So, I will be starting radiation therapy soon. I have two appointments this week. I will see the doctor again and they will put me on the table and so some sort of dry run. I will have a 3 dimensional CT scan. They have to know exactly where my organs are so they can protect my kidneys and my liver. If they radiate them it could kill me. Since they removed my omentum (layer of fat that protects your organs and keeps them in place) apparently my organs are sort of free floating. I will go in 5 days a week for treatment. Depending on how well I tolerate it, the treatment will last between 3 and 6 weeks. Side effects include fatigue, nausea, and diarrhea. How fun for me! I am dreading this, but not as much as I would dread another surgery.

So, now the mantra is zap all remaining microscopic cancer and get that CA125 down to a 7!

Here I am, last summer, blissfully unaware my cancer was back, sitting on the beach at Joyce's house:


Namaste,

Jill

3 comments:

  1. My brother's dog Shellby had cancer on her leg too. It grew pretty big, and they were going to put her down because they thought they were going to have to amputate her leg and she was old. They found a doctor here in Ft Collins that was doing an experiment on a cancer drug. He did it on Shellby, it was just drug that he injected into her tumor. After about a week, the tumor started to melt away, then after a few weeks later it was gone, the doctor did not expect it. He was so excited, she was his best subject. After the trial was over, he had a party and Shellby was the star! She lived for another year or two after that and the cancer did come back, but not as bad, she lived to be about 14 or 15. At least she did some good for research and got a couple more years. I don't know if that doctor or treatment is around any more, but I could find out if you would like?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Sure Sarah, I'd like to know what drug it was. Thanks. Love and miss you! Jill

    ReplyDelete
  3. It's OK to be angry. I call cancer the crap shoot disease....no rhyme or reason to it. I still remember the sound of the door shutting in the radiation room. All three of us who were there 11 years ago are still alive and kicking. As you will be. Hugs.

    ReplyDelete